Vampire Diaries “Crying Wolf” Recap: That’s not heroic, that’s tragic.

Just a heads up guys, I have a lot to say about this episode. Fangirling may be involved as well. I’m going to get started now.

Previously, Tyler and Jules became somewhat of wolf BFFs, Damon and Stefan conversate on how to keep Elena safe using their eyebrows, and Brady has some fun torturing vampire barbie, Caroline, which very much so upset me.

That’s right Jules, burn your friends. It’s not so fun now that it’s your wolf buddies all in a pile getting burned. You stand there and you watch them burn. I will never like you. I don’t like Jules, Brady and their wolf buddies, but the other bad guys, Katherine, Elijah, and maybe Uncle John, these villains, I like. They should stick around for a while, you know, because I’m with the vamps. So, this scene just makes me cringe a bit because I’m against the werewolves at the moment for everything that has happened already. But, that Stevie guy is like the Slater of werewolves.

I looove Elena falling out of bed. You have no idea how much I threw my head back and laughed at that. If I were Caroline, I wouldn’t want to hear the phone ringing after a night of being tortured by a highly psychotic werewolf who has a major hatred for vampires like Damon has for werewolves. Unf, Stefan in a wife-beater. Perfect boyfriend. I just don’t like how Elena can’t get through a girl’s night sleepover without having the “I miss you and I love you, let’s do something later” phone call from the perfect boyfriend. Did I mention that arranging that sleepover makes him a perfect boyfriend?

Irrelevant Damon brainwashing the news lady, Andie Star, to thinking that Damon is actually the perfect boyfriend- sweet, and funny, and honest, and he could be the one. Boy please. Moving on to the bromance of Damon and Alaric. I really like Alaric. He’s with Jenna, and she needs some lovin’. Such funny lines though- “Please tell me you’re not going to kill him at the tea party.” Damon’s always so subtle.

Bonnie and Caroline evil plan making to get Luka to talk about Elijah’s plan while looking adorable. Then Matt moving on from the hurt little puppy to being all pissed at Caroline.

Benedict Tyler with the wolf pack. I’m a little glad Tyler is finally asking about what this moonstone is, it’s about time. Werewolf version of Slater calling Katherine “Kathy” seriously annoyed me. Katherine sounds more bamf like. Kathy is like the blonde girl next door who dances to Taylor Swift in her pjs. By the way, Mason looks so good in that picture, very happy and alive. If it wasn’t for the fact that he tried to kill Stefan and Damon (mostly Stefan), than I would miss him a little more.

AW, Matt. I feel bad for him. His life kind of sucks at the moment. Fighting with his girlfriend while carrying bottles of ketchup, and salt and pepper shakers, busing tables. And then Tyler has to show up and argue with her in public?! I really just want to stab him repeatedly. When I first watched this, I didn’t realize that he took something, so now I’m even more angry at Tyler than I was before. It’s good to see a love triangle on the show actually be a love triangle. Not just one couple and another guy brooding and complaining about how he can never have her. Yeah, you know what I’m talking about. Matt gets physical here pretty quick. You fight for your girl Matty! But the guy is a werewolf so be careful he doesn’t break your neck either.

Stefan in a hoodie! My favorite thing for him to wear, you know, next to a wife-beater, if he really has to wear something. If anyone was actually following my tweets on twitter, I pretty much just fangirled during anything Stefan/Elena related. Then I was tweet jailed for it but it’s ok. Anyways, Tyler SUCKS right now. I didn’t notice this at first either! Geez man, do you have any idea how much I hate you right now. I went from bawling my eyes out watching him transform for the first to time to wishing he gets run over by a train. He’s the reason Stefan/Elena sexy time was interrupted. Do you not even sit and contemplate handing over all your friends for a sacrifice to break some curse? I mean I know that you’re going through something I can never imagine and it’s pretty much taking over your life but dang dude! Apparently, Tyler does not think before he acts.

The beginning of Stefan/Elena sexy time! Well, Elena’s having a moment in Stefan’s awesome little porsche before the sexy time actually begins. I really want to see her life before the accident. It’s very good to her storyline. And she can be such a good liar too! Even I believed her for a moment. I felt so bad for Stefan, I kind of just wanted to jump in and take him away anyway. Elena really has that Petrova fire. And then I began getting giddy and highly jealous at the same time when she invited him in. That woman has the best job ever.

I love Jenna’s expression when Damon kisses Andie in front of her. Then there’s Elijah. Such a bamf vampire and he fits in perfectly fine at a town tea party. I like him.

Blah, Bonnie and Luka. Not as good as Bonnie and Jeremy. Jer got offended a bit when Caroline said she was giving him a sex vibe. It was so cute. I think she’s the first one to notice Bonnie and Jeremy’s new thing. Everyone in this town seems to be oblivious toward everything. Then Bonnie slipped Luka a witch roofie! She’s amazing. She needs to be on screen more often.

YES, more Stefan and Elena cuteness at the creek. Elena takes a little trip down memory lane for a moment. Stefan and Elena start to talk about the future. They haven’t really talked about the obvious circumstances and obstacles for a vampire-human relationship. And they continue to not talk about it. But Stefan is the cutest thing to ever walk the earth with this scene! Oh my jesus. The jealousy I have of that woman!! But I still love her. This scene has to be my favorite Stefan and Elena scene. I continue to rewind it and sulk in the adorableness that is this couple. “This is a future memory. It’s where your boyfriend whispers to you that he loves you….. I love you.” BE ANY MORE ADORABLE STEFAN. I DARE YOU. Did I mention how I’m in love with a fictional character? If I wasn’t already, that moment just made me fall in love with Stefan.

I really hate how we go from such an adorable moment to an a-hole moment from Uncle John. It’s crap like that that makes me hate you John! “I don’t think you should sleepover anymore. It’s inappropriate with children in the house. And that ring that Isobel gave you.. I’m going to want that back.” You know what!? I have some choice words for you Uncle John! But I can’t say what I want to say at the moment! Do not mess with Alaric. That was an a-hole move. On the upside, Elijah put Damon in his place! “You young vampires. So arrogant.” Yes, Elijah! It’s about time that someone did this to Damon. And I’m happy he did. Damon, you think you all that, but see, you are nothing!

STEFAN COOKS. Stefan freaking cooks! In love. I’m just in love. They kind of look like a married couple. Stefan cooking, cutting up vegetables, while Elena sits on the couch watching him and drinking a glass of wine. It works for them though, but where’s the lovin’? I personally think anything Paul wears makes him look hot. So did the dead great granddad’s hunting jacket. Only because it’s Paul. “Stefan, my parents bedroom..” Woman, he obviously does not care about that. There’s a bed, get to it. I love how Stefan just kills the mood by ripping down that wall without even asking Elena about it. And it looks like her parents were really into the whole family legacy.

D’aw, look at Jeremy, being all worried and protective again. I love how Caroline and Bonnie are just having a casual gril talk session about a crush while some what hovering over the body of some warlock they’re about to hypnotize into telling them more supernatural secrets about that annoying rock. Very casual, very normal day.

More bromance! Yes Alaric, please continue to comment on Elijah’s hair. Damon and Alaric’s relationship is amazing. “Please, just don’t kill her.” “If I do, who will report her death?” I get the witty line. She’s a news reporter so if she dies she can’t report her own death. Ah, haha, knee slapper. So, anyways, I completely freaked out at this next scene. I almost thought that Alaric would die but he has that nifty little ring Isobel gave him so he’s ok. But Jules and her wolf pack need to go somewhere. They ruined a good bromance scene.

See, Tyler, now is the good time for your hesitation. Last night, when you hesitated to let Caroline out of that doggy cage, that was a bad time for any hesitation. But going to kill a life long friend of yours for that curse, you have no problem with that? Boy I will cut you. And Brady too. “Good, because if you wuss out, you’ll have me to deal with.” And if you don’t die soon, you and I will have a lovely little confrontation in which I chop your head off and rip out your heart. Your serious face doesn’t scare me.

I officially declare a petition to sacrifice John Gilbert instead of Elena. “Until you get a lawyer, file for guardianship, it’s my call and there’s nothing you can do about it.” Yes Jenna, please tell him off! He’s royally pissing me off. Since he is against the vampires, no one likes him. You are either with the vamps or you’re not. And stop getting into everyone’s business dude. You’re just there to protect Elena. Please shut up now. Again, I cannot use those choice words I have for him.

Oh look, the Damon torture scene. Watching this last night, I didn’t like it because it did seem pretty gory. Now, I just put my hands in the air like I don’t care. It’s nice to see Damon get a taste of his own medicine. “Oh, the irony in this moment.” Now he’s the one being tortured about the moonstone. There’s not much I have to say about this scene anyway. Just continue to torture him a bit more.

Bonnie is another bamf! We are getting a ton of info on Klaus and Elijah from ManWitch junior here. So here’s the deal: Elijah’s master plan is to kill Klaus. Elijah has Jonas and Luka helping him in that. Klaus has Luka’s sister held up somewhere, captive, trying to figure out some way to break the curse without the doppelganger. And in order to kill Klaus, Elena has to die, because apparently this sacrifice will weaken him. So, I’m sitting here just yelling about how I think this show is trying to kill me with everything that goes on. I’m going to be a little heartless here and say that I’d rather have Luka’s sister die and not Elena. After all this, Jeremy and Luka have a possibility that one of the sisters will die. I say down with Luka’s sister. Just because I don’t know who she is, so I don’t like here but I don’t dislike her either. And because it’s Elena too. It’s tragic though.

Stefan, outside, alone, in the dark, in a shed. What ever may happen now? Oh, yeah, freakin’ Brady pops out of nowhere and shoots Stefan! Stop trying to kill my husband!

Tyler, do you even know how to handle a gun? I’ve barely seen the kid pick up a knife. How did you even get to this point? He looks so desperate to kill Elena for his own personal good. But I give him this, for now- he doesn’t know she has to die until Stefan tells him in this scene. “They didn’t tell you that part did they? Who’s the liars now?” Bamf Stefan is still a bamf while having two wooden bullets inside him. Trevino is a good actor though. He kills these scenes, but I still hate Tyler.

Elena is still a badass without her ponytail! Everyone on this show is a bamf! She plays it very smart in this scene and has me freaking out on the edge of my seat. Elena stabs Brady a good two or three times and of course you guys can imagine my reaction to Brady getting hurt, BY ELENA. Then she leads him right to Stefan, which he rips Brady’s heart out. Bravo, Stefan. Bravo. But, don’t get any of that heart blood on her while hugging. “I didn’t know what they were going to do to you.” My man, you have already used this excuse with Caroline! Get a new line damn it! I am so tired of you! I do not forgive you! I understand that you don’t want to be like that anymore and everything, but be smart damn it! I am so tired of you, I just can’t even! Ugh! Go away!

BAMF ELIJAH. He’s my favorite “villain.” I just love Ian’s face when Elijah starts ripping hearts out like a pro. And the fact that even while being tortured, he still keeps that lovely smirk on his face. I love Smolderhalder. Elijah continues to rip hearts out. And I just happened to have died laughing while werewolf Slater, Stevie, curls up in the fetal position in his jacket to avoid Elijah. Either way, I just did not care if Elijah happened to leave him alive. But he probably snapped his neck instead of ripping out his heart.

Alaric wakes up from his dead sleep and calls Jenna. He’s the greatest. Even though, saying “I fell asleep” sort of stretches the truth a bit. But at least he calls!

It’s really great that everyone is keeping each other informed and in the loop. I’m somewhat upset at Elena just like Stefan. But I’m impressed that she realized Elijah’s choice of words in that deal. And they both have a point in this. Stefan has lived, when he almost wanted to kill himself, it pretty much wouldn’t be a big deal. He’s been around 162 years, so to sacrifice himself for someone he loves, to me, wouldn’t be such a big deal. But for Elena to sacrifice herself, at 16, 17 years old, it’s definitely not heroic, it is tragic. And at the same time, to sacrifice one person instead of a whole group is some what better. I mean, she definitely doesn’t want to be the last one standing, alone without her loved ones.

THIS SCENE. Bonnie and Jeremy! This moment. Oh my god. I loved it. I fangirled so much. Watching this last night, I freaked a bit, and twitter didn’t let me express what was going through my head because I was tweet jailed. But I just mostly jump up and down, flail my arms around and yell “OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD.” This scene was perfect though. “You think I’m hot?” Yes, Steven! We think you have grown up very well on the show. He took control of that kiss! That was hot. I’ve been waiting for that to happen for a while. I’m glad they didn’t decide to hook up off screen.

I really like this song. This show has some of the best songs for the perfect moments.

Matt and Tyler at the grill, this was a bit of a touching moment. I’m glad he finally told Matt what was really going on without actually telling him what he’s going through. His speech was great, and that made me lighten up on him a lot. The fact that Matt doesn’t interrupt him or get upset when Tyler says he fell for her, it really says a lot about their relationship. They grew up together, they’re best friends, and this moment really shows it. I was seriously upset that Tyler was going to leave. But I think the show has spent a good amount of time on his story this season and there’s other stories to be told, like Elijah’s plan, the sacrifice, Klaus, Jeremy and Bonnie. Tyler pissed me off to the point where I really wanted him to fall in a well at the beginning of the episode, but this last montage makes me feel like we’re losing an awesome character for a while.

Next week: BAMF STEFAN FLASHBACKS. THANK YOU. I cannot wait for next weeks episode. Maros Siega directed this episode and I think he’s awesome. I think we should trend BAMFStefan next week. And major applause to everyone who helped trend TVDStelena last night!